Salam and good morning to all my brothers and sisters.
Wow, it has been a long time since I had updated my blog, isn't it? Well, the truth is I do have so many stories to be shared with you. However, I don't have moods to open my Asou's bag and take it out and turn it on. I don't know why. Sometimes not everything we can share with other people, right? Especially thing regarding our feelings, emotions, and of course all o ou secrets. No matter. I have decided to update my blog today after had being insisted by my several friends for several times. Today, I have opened my heart widely to put as many stories as possible in my blog so that you'll know what is actually playing aroud my mind for all this while. In sha'a Allah (special thanks to all my friends who were keep reminding to update my blog, especially Siti and Iqah. This is specially for you...=))
I don't exactly know what is happening to me all these days. Since my classes have started, I feel something isn't right inside of me. I have no idea what am I going to write in here, but the thing is I really don't understand why is this happening to me. Especially at night. Everytime before I get ready to go to bed, I'll rewind everything that I had done on that particular day, from the morning until the evening and when I am memorising it, suddenly my tears are rolling down my cheeks without I want it to. Pretty weird, isn't it? Yes, I know so. There is something isn't right inside of my heart. I feel something is missing inside of me.I don't know what is it and I don't know how to express it here. Everytime before I go to sleep, accompanied by the tears on my cheeks, I'll text my one and only mother. I'll tell her everything I feel at that time and she is the one who will comfort me. Only she can do that to calm me, nobody can. Of course! I came from her womb, of course only she knows what is exactly her daughters look like. Only she can understand my feelings, no one can.
I don't know... (crying...).
God, please help me!!!!
Let me ask you some questions. Prepare yourself. I bet it is going to be the scariest questions you will ever hear and you won't be asked by other people except me. Hehehehe... kidding! In sha'a Allah you're gonna love to anwer them. Okay. How do you feel when someone you don't even know him/her, someone you don't even meet him/her before and someone who is called as "secret admirer" tells you that he/she has fallen in love with you? Another question will be what is your expression when there is someone who is seriously and honestly proposing you to become his/her his wife/husband? What I mean here is this second person is confident that you are the perfect match granted by Allah for him/her after he/she has done Istikharah prayers for several times? Hmm... please don't get me wrong. I just want you to think about it yourself. Try to answer these questions and keep it to yourself but it's nothing wrong to share them with your closest keens.
"What is Hazimah trying to say by asking these sort of weird questions anyway?"
Astaghfirullah!!! One the most fearful thing that I'll be facing by next week, I think. What do you think it will be? PRESENTATION!!! Yes, sure t is. Even I like to do presentations in front of people but still I can presume myself as a "cowardy" in front of everybody. What a shameful thing to say here. The presentations that must be completed by this semster (which is our last semester) are CCT and Oral Communication.
Please pray for me. I hope Allah will give me enough courage to speak in front of people. So that I will no longer call myself as a cowardy anymore. I want to be the best public speaker just like my other friends.
In sha'a Allah.
Today is already Saturday. So, what will be the day after Saturday? You are absolutely right! Congratulations!!! The day after Saturday is Sunday! Sure Sunday is the day that I have been waiting for. But which Sunday is Hazimah talking to? There are many Sundays in a month. Perhaps four? Now I'm telling you, the only Sunday that I've been waiting for is "tomorrow's" Sunday! 28th June 2009. Why? Is there someone who will ask you to go a date with him? No, of course not! I'm muslimah. I won't do such thing in my life. It's totally forbidden in Islam. Allah won't bless me if I do so. Nau'dhubillah... Okay, let me get this straight. I can't wait to see someone that I've been missing so much for about a year. The person is my sister! My twin! She'll be back tomorrow! On the day of Sunday!!! Don't you feel happy for me? Please do! I don't know what to say to express my delightedness!!! I really really want to see her face again. Only Allah knows how much I miss her.
Okay, kak uda, I can't wait to hug you!!!
Love you so much! (uwekk2...)
END OF THE STORIES
DO WHAT YOU LOVE
"Do what you love and you'll be good at it. Sounds simple enough. But what if you love reading comics, playing video games and watching korean dramas until your eyes pop out? Is it possible to make a career out of such things? What's the alternative? Spend all your time wishing you were brave enough to take that leap? Don't let fear stop you from doing what you love. Because ultimately, it's about being true to yourself."