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i know what's right and what's wrong. i am cheerful and out going. it's hard for me to find the one that i want, but once i find the right person, i won't be able to fall in love again for a long time.

DO WHAT YOU LOVE

"Do what you love and you'll be good at it. Sounds simple enough. But what if you love reading comics, playing video games and watching korean dramas until your eyes pop out? Is it possible to make a career out of such things? What's the alternative? Spend all your time wishing you were brave enough to take that leap? Don't let fear stop you from doing what you love. Because ultimately, it's about being true to yourself."

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Thursday, 31 January 2013

When heart breaks, it's silent

~Bismillah~

"When you drop a glass or a plate to the ground it makes a loud crashing sound. When a window shatters a table leg breaks or when a picture falls off the wall it makes a noise. But as for your heart when that breaks it's completely silent. You would think as it's so important it would make the loudest noise in the whole world or even have some  of ceremonious sound like the gong of a cymbal or the ringing of a bell. But it's silent and you almost wish there was a noise to distract you from the pain. If there is a noise it's internal. It screams and no one can hear it but you. It screams so loud your ears ring and your head aches. It trashes around in your chest like a great white shark caught in the sea it roars like a mother bear whose cub has been taken. That's what it looks like and that's what it sounds like a trashing panicking trapped great big beast roaring like a prisoner to its own emotions. But that's the thing about love no one is untouchable." 
— Cecelia Ahern (If You Could See Me Now)



... just like my heart. Right now, at this very moment, it's breaking. It even breaks mostly everyday and it's completely silent. Nobody could ever hear it breaks but me. It's so aching and it continues to ache until I cannot bear with it anymore. The tears streaming down my cheeks is hardly to stop, because there's no strength to lift my hand up and wipe it. Am I too weak? Definitely, not! I badly want to be strong again. I just need more time to recover from this 'illness.' Give me some time and space so that I can go through the process of purifying my heart. Then, I'll be back as a refreshing, 
brand-new person who you can be proud of.

Trust me.

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