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i know what's right and what's wrong. i am cheerful and out going. it's hard for me to find the one that i want, but once i find the right person, i won't be able to fall in love again for a long time.


"Do what you love and you'll be good at it. Sounds simple enough. But what if you love reading comics, playing video games and watching korean dramas until your eyes pop out? Is it possible to make a career out of such things? What's the alternative? Spend all your time wishing you were brave enough to take that leap? Don't let fear stop you from doing what you love. Because ultimately, it's about being true to yourself."


Wednesday, 13 March 2013

"Falling in love is when...," says Ibn Hazm


#Some of the symptoms are...

-The lover gazing at the beloved unblinkingly; his eyes follow the loved one's every movement, withdrawing as he withdraws, inclining as he inclines, just as the chameleon's stare shifts with the shifting of the sun

#Some signs of love...

1-The lover will direct his conversation to the beloved even when he purports
2-When the loved one speaks, the lover listens with rapt attention to his every word; he marvels at everything the beloved says; he believes him implicitly even when he is clearly lying; agrees with him though he is obviously in the wrong, etc.
3-The lover hurries to the spot where the beloved is at the moment; endeavours to sit near to him as possible 
4-Sudden confusion and excitement betrayed by the lover when he unexpectedly see the one he loves coming upon him unawares, that agitation which overmasters him on beholding someone who resembles his beloved or on hearing his name suddenly pronounced
5-A man in love will give prodigally, to the limit of his capacity, in order that he may show off his good points and make himself desirable
6-When a woman fall in love with a man, it's like "the miser opened his purse strings, the scowler relaxed his frown, the coward leapt heroically into the fray, the clod suddenly become sharp-witted, the boor turned into the perfect gentleman, the stinker transformed into the elegant dandy, the sloucher smartened up, the decrepit  recaptured his lost youth, the godly gone wild, the self-respecting kicked over the traces-and all because of love! 
7-The lover almost entreating to hear the loved one's name pronounced, taking an extreme delight in speaking about him
8-A fondness of for solitude and a pleasure in being alone 
9-Sleeplessness is a common affliction of lovers
10-The lover loving his beloved's kith and kin and the intimate ones of his household, to such extent that they are nearer and dearer to him than his own folk, himself and all his familiar friends
11-Weeping is a well-known sign of love, except that men differ very greatly from one another in this particular. Some are ready weepers; their tear-ducts are always overflowing and their eyes respond immediately to their emotions, the tears rolling down at a moment's notice. Others are dry-eyed and barren of tears 
12-When the lover is unsure of the constancy of his loved one's feelings for him, perpetually on his guard in a way that he never troubled to be before; he polishes his language and he refines his gestures and his glances
13-The way the lover pays attention to the beloved; remembering everything that falls from his lips; searching out of all the news about him, so that nothing small or great that happens to him may escape his knowledge; following closely his every movement

 #Some of the outward signs and tokens of love (that usually attack our youths today) are including...

Abundant and exceeding cheerfulness at finding oneself with the beloved in a narrow space and a corresponding depression on being together in a wide expanse; to engage in a playful tug of war for anything the one or the other lays hold of; much clandestine winking; leaning sideways and supporting oneself against the object of one's affection, endeavoring to touch his hand and whatever part of his body one can reach, while engaged in conversation; and drinking the remainder of what the beloved has left in his cup, seeking out the very spot against which his lips were pressed. 

#Some contrary signs of love...

When they love each other with and equal ardour and their mutual affection is intensely strong, they will turn against one another without any valid reason, each purposely contradicting the other in whatever he may say; they quarrel violently over the smallest things, each picking up every word that the other lets fall and wilfully misinterpreting it. All these devices are aimed at testing and proving what each is seeking in the other. Now the difference between this sham, and real aversion and contrariness born of deep-seated hatred and inveterate contention, is that lovers are very quickly reconciled after their disputes. You will observe them to have become best of friends once more. When you see a pair of lovers are behaving in such a fashion, you will be convinced that there lies between them a deep and hidden secret-the secret of true love. Take this then for a sure test, a universally valid experiment: it is the product only of an equal partnership in love and a true concord of hearts.

**All are taken from Ibn Hazm's article, "Falling in Love" in The Dove's Necklace

p.s.: What is love? Only those who have experienced it will know how to define it and able to differentiate between true love and false love. Wallahua'lam.

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